Second and Final Draft of Memoir: Worked on December 3-6

This was the biggest match of the summer.  After months upon months of struggling with various ailments and confidence, I finally reached the finals of a tournament.  While I did minimize this achievement because it was a bit of a smaller tournament, I still had to win three matches just to get a chance to win my first trophy in years.  I needed this win as a reassurance that all the work I have been putting in was not completely worthless.  As I stepped to the baseline and blasted my first serve for an ace, I thought that I finally was going to get some assurance, but NO, that would be too simple! I tensed up and played to not lose instead of a win.  After my last shot sailed out of bounds, my heart sank into the biggest abyss imaginable.  I simply felt as though I was a fly trapped in the jar of forward progress and that this jar could simply never be pried open.  The game was beginning to become far too painful for a game that I am supposed to enjoy.  After remaining heartbroken for a while, I swallowed my pride and entered into the next tournament.  And wouldn’t you know it, the same thing happened… For a game that I love so much, it sometimes feels like a complete and utter burden.  I kept thinking too myself, “You have been putting the time and work in, so shouldn’t the results follow suit?”  Why is that I feel so free on the court, yet I am playing as if I have had shackles placed upon my feet and wrists?  No matter how awful I feel after a loss, I know my time is coming because I am simply due for more success.  However, I know that these feelings of failure will not go away, because unfortunately failure is simply an “essential” part of life that cannot be avoided.  

However, no matter how frustrating it can be, what I love about tennis is that there is always an opportunity to correct your mistakes the next day, if not the next point or the next shot.